Of all the indulgences in all the world, nothing tempts me more than a big hunk of crusty bread. Swear it! Cakes, candies, and steaks aside, nothing is more enticing, more mouthwatering, more completely my food addiction than a warm, buttery loaf of sourdough. I could eat the whole thing if I threw aside my self restraint– which honestly, can be quite hard to do sometimes.
Why is it that I pay such homage to a humble loaf of bread? Berries, in all their tart and colorful sweetness, have infinitely more health benefits. Greens are bursting with many more vitamins, minerals, and phytochemicals, keeping me well longer. Of all the foods to declare, with the utmost surety, that I love and adore with all my heart, I wish it wasn’t bread. As I write and share with you all these things about living and being healthy, I wish I could say every second of it falls into place for me, that I crave kale and down wheat grass shots like it’s going out of style– because being healthy just is, there’s no struggle. I sail through without temptation.
The truth is that I do struggle, like all of you. I have my triggers, the foods I will bargain with myself to eat more often than I know I should. I have mindlessly eaten half a pizza, washing it down with all the pop flavors in the machine mixed together. I’ve subsided on mostly skittles and sweet tea for a whole day. I’ve done the worst of it, and while I’m getting better I get stuck on bread ALL THE TIME. A sourdough bread bowl, which would probably feed a family of six, need not be consumed by me alone, brimming with hot soup and a sprinkle of melted cheese. The aftermath was one of those “I should have had a salad” moments.
I debated not sharing this recipe (but isn’t it lovely?) because after looking it over a time or two, I thought: This is a healthy living blog, right? Isn’t that deliciously unhealthy amount of bread a bad thing to show people? The feeling was akin to walking into a job interview with raggedy sweat pants and no make-up on– exposed, unkempt. For better or worse, being polished is sort of my thing. It shows how much I care, that everything I do I place thought and wisdom into, and to me those qualities seem necessary and important.
So after this silly internal drama cooled down, I realized an element that I often miss. Vulnerability. I don’t love exposing my bad, I mean really does anyone? I’m awkward at showing and sharing my pitfalls, because I think it negates who I am and what I’m about– which is honestly committed to having a healthy relationship with food.
Silly me. I’ve since realized that sharing where I struggle, where I fall off the wagon head first, is important. People need to know they aren’t alone in struggling to stay the course. Struggle is a huge element of change– and if we really intend to change, we have to work through constant struggle. Temptation exists for us all– and maybe in our generation more for food than any other– and so being honest about what temptations I deal with on a daily basis may help you to know you aren’t alone in your imperfection. I am horribly, tragically, dangerous-to-myself imperfect, and it will always be that way.
My name is Leighanna, and I’m a bread addict. Admission is the first step to change, right? So I’ll be working on holding myself accountable, and while I do that, you should check out this great recipe.
Broccoli Soup in Sourdough Bread Bowls
- 1 large head of broccoli, stem included
- 2 carrots, peeled and chopped
- 1 small onion, diced
- 3 potatoes, boiled and mashed (or 1 cup leftover mashed potato)
- 4-5 cups vegetable stock or water
- splash of unsweetened non-dairy milk (I used soy)
- 1/2 cup fontina cheese, shredded
- salt and pepper to taste
Sauté the onion and carrots together in the bottom or a large pot on medium heat, until fragrant, about 10-12 minutes. Add stock, and bring to a simmer. Add chopped broccoli, leafy little stemmed parts and all. Cook until veggies are tender, stir in leftover mashed potato (if you are preparing fresh mash, you could boil the taters diced in little pieces in the soup, then puree half the soup when finished, to add some thickness to it. Less work = best thing. Choices choices!) If the soup is not as thick as desired, either let simmer on low until soup condenses and thickens, or ladle 1/2 the pot’s contents into a blender, and puree smooth, then add it back in. As your last step, stir in shredded fontina cheese, with an extra dollop on top.
* I bought my bread bowls from Panera for a darn good price, though I’m sure they are available elsewhere. Using a serrated knife, cut a wide circle in the top of the loaf, like carving a pumpkin. Pull the lid off, and scoop some of the bready insides out, to hollow out a bowl.
Wise & Wonderful Cookery 